1. |
yesterday
05:16
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|
i don't want to be another person on your list of almosts
i called you out on good intention but you sacrificed your own discretion
and now you're impeding my sense of self
and now you pretend that you're somewhere else
if only i could peel off all my skin
if only we could fix ourselves again
then you would trust that i'm still here
i'm still here; i promise i'm still here
i keep hearing hearing voices telling me to leave, but the voices are me
i don't think it's ordinary, but neither are you or the lies you undo
places, pictures
our hearts align at different times
but distances were trivial as long as we were both alive
faceless faces never felt like anything compared to yours, compared to mine
complacent in everything
it's as if i met you yesterday
even if our times are gone and even if we fell for them
it's as if i met you yesterday
i'll never let it go
i'll never let you go
i've lost my way home
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2. |
haha pwnd
02:58
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|
can we have another year
this all seems so foreign to me
don't be sorry for my loss if there's nothing you can find
what am I supposed to say?
it's fine, i'll be okay
where's my home now?
the bed is made but i'm never sleeping
i feel you here
the door is locked and you'll mislead me
so that i'll think
that you never left and you're on your way back
every time i think of all the bridges that we burned
through our disagreements over shit we never learned
i can't help but think that there was more i should've said
to let you know you let me down but we were silent instead
so get away (i don't wanna go)
where's my home now?
the bed is made but i'm never sleeping
i feel you here
the door is locked and you'll mislead me
so that i'll think
that you never left and you're on your way back
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3. |
nervous
05:32
|
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an idle disposition won't let me figure out how to leave my house
my body sinks through the bed frame while i just contemplate this out of body mind state
i never do react when you utter empty messages without a return address
it's you who never asked what exactly constitutes anything anymore
wind blows through the window
it starts to chill my bones
i just think i need one more episode
i'm starting to protest this state of mind
the silence will eventually consume me
i'm tired of calling you late at night
just cause i'm feeling dissatisfaction
i would do anything
i never do react when you utter empty messages without a return address
it's you who never asked what exactly constitutes anything anymore
why do i get so nervous around you?
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4. |
gingerbread
03:58
|
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5. |
interlude
03:28
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6. |
lights out
05:23
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i've worked too hard to sleep this bad
catching up just slows everything down
tell me what it's like to dream
i can't turn the lights out
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7. |
steve
04:51
|
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i used to think about loss as unconditional
but your absence is an absence with condition
i used to think we never went and our stagnant state was permanent
but your impermanence haunts me every day
i feel like i never got to process
but what's to process there's not progress and no hope for anything
will you answer my calls
why won't you answer my calls
assess my body and drain my energy
my anger isn't all i've learned to hide from
repress the lights on broken nights
i'll live on even if i have to live numb
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8. |
frank
07:39
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i'm counting every second of every day of every year
relying on the time i'm wasting
stealing words from verses of all our favorite songs
arranging all the lines for when we'll never talk
i'm inclined to accusation but there's no one to accuse
except for untouched instruments in this empty room
the sound of silence deafens me; it glorifies the vacancy
that tends to complicate thoughts
i'm falling short of sanity; is this even my mentality?
what exactly is telling my lungs to breathe?
slowly we die for all of our lives
and i'm not scared for that at all
slowly we die for all of our lives
we embrace the words until we fall
slowly we die for all of our lives
someone paint these empty walls
slowly we die for all of our lives
embracing words until they fail
to comfort our hearts any longer
it's nothing shy of speculation
to be making these implications
so in betw33n all the drive-ins and dine-ins we wHined in l8 @ night
u kissed me on the cheek n u told me it'll be great!!! i love it! (the moments we share)
in between them, do u kno how i f e e l ??
so if u wanna leave
if u wa
n n a leave
if u wanna leave!! the room the world my conscience
warn me pls :+*
slowly we die for all of our lives
and i'm not scared for that at all
slowly we die for all of our lives
we embrace the words until we fall
slowly we die for all of our lives
someone paint these empty walls
slowly we die for all of our lives
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:+/ Denver, Colorado
elias williamson //
portland, CO
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